A complex is a phobia. A complex is a large building. A complex is another word for complicated. So if you have a phobia about complicated large buildings, you might be said to have a complex complex complex.

One day a three legged dog walked into a bar. He said, "I'm looking for the guy that shot my paw."

What was 50 Cent's daughter named? Penny!

A couple was about to celebrate 50 years together. Their three kids, all very successful and wealthy, agreed to a Sunday dinner in honour of their parents. As usual, they were all late and had varied excuses. "Happy anniversary, Mom and Dad," gushed son number one. "Sorry, I'm running late... I just didn't have the time to get you a present." "No worry," said Dad. "The important thing is that we're all together." Son number two arrived and announced, "Just flew in from L.A. and didn't have time to get you anything... I'm sorry." "It's nothing," said the father, "just glad you could be here today." The daughter arrived. "Happy anniversary! I'm sorry, but I've been out of town and didn't bring a present." Again the father said, "I really don't care, at least the five of us are together today." Later, during dinner, the father put down his fork, looked up and said, "Listen, you three, there's something your mother and I need to tell you. We came to this country penniless and desperate. Despite this, we were able to raise you and send you to college. But we never got around to getting married." The three kids gasped and said, in unison, "You mean we're BASTARDS?" "Yep," said the dad. "And cheap ones, too!"

Nine cats were on a boat. One jumped off. How many were left? None. They were all copy-cats!

Next time you start to groan at friend's pun, ask yourself: Am I just being jealous?: "A pun is the lowest form of humor -- when you don't think of it first." --Oscar Levant "Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted." --Fred Allen "A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents." --G. C. Lichtenberg

Why did the tent agree to stand up all night? He was roped into it!

A couple of teenagers craving something sweet drove to the nearest Baskin-Robbins. They bought ice cream cones and returned to their car to be comfortable. As they settled back to enjoy themselves, two ravens landed on the front hood and began to caw and flutter, and to peck at the windshield. The young man finally figured out what they wanted. He finished his ice cream, opened the window, and put his empty cone on the hood. The birds immediately settled down to eat. "You're wonderful," said his girlfriend. "How did you ever think of that?" "Nothing to it," he replied. "It was just a case of stilling two birds with one cone."

The other day I went to a zoo, but the only animal there was a dog. It was a shihtzu.

Once upon a time, there was a fairy called Nuff. Fair enough.