"A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: Duh." --Conan O'Brien "In elementary school, in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest. What is the logic? Do tall people burn slower?" --Warren Hutcherson "If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either." --Dick Cavett "I was a vegetarian until I started leaning towards sunlight." --Rita Rudner "Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography." --Paul Rodriguez "When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family knew someone in the Royal family?" --Robin Williams If the president of the USA has to be a natural-born citizen, could a test- tube baby ever be president? --Stephen Wright