A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were walking along the beach. Suddenly a seagull flies over and craps all over them. The brunette say's in a disgusted voice; "Hang on, the bathroom is just up the hill. I'll go get some toilet paper." After she leaves, the blonde begins to laugh. The redhead asks, "What's so funny?" The blonde says "Well, blondes are suppose to be so dumb.......but look at her.......by the time she gets back with the toilet paper that seagull will be miles away!"

A blonde girl just stepped into the bathtub when the doorbell rang. "Who is it?""Blind man," came the response. Feeling charitable, the blonde dashed from the tub without bothering to put on any clothes, grabbed her purse, and opened the door. The man's jaw dropped and he stammered, "Wh-where do you want me to put these blinds, lady?"

A blonde goes for a job interview in an office. The interviewer decides to start with the basics. 'So, Miss, can you tell us your age, please?' The blonde counts carefully on her fingers for about 30 seconds before replying, 'Ehhhh .. 22!' The interviewer tries another straightforward one to break the ice. 'And can you tell us your height, please?' The young lady stands up and produces a measuring tape from her handbag. She then traps one end under her foot and extends the tape to the top of her head. She checks the measurement and announces, 'Five foot two!' This isn't looking good so the interviewer goes for the real basics. 'And uhh, just to confirm for our records, your name please?' The blonde bobs her head from side to side for about twenty seconds, mouthing something silently to herself, before replying, 'Mandy!' The interviewer is completely baffled at this stage, so he asks, 'Just out of curiosity, Miss. We can understand your counting on your fingers to work out your age, and the measuring tape for your height is obvious, but what were you doing when we asked you your name?' 'Ohh that!', replies the blonde, 'That's just me running through 'Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you....''

a blonde goes to an electronic store. She goes up to the salesman and says " I'd like to buy this TV" the salesman replies "sorry I don't sell to blondes" the blonde, very angry goes home. The next day she dresses up very professionally, pins her hair up and puts on a pair of glasses. She goes back to the store and says to the same salesman "I'd like to buy this TV" The salesman again says "sorry but I don't sell to blondes" Now the blonde is very angry. The next day she dyes her hair brown and puts on the glasses and goes back to the store. Again she says to the salesman "I'd like to buy this TV" and again the salesman replies "Sorry I don't sell to blondes" The blonde starts yelling "I'm not blonde, look my hair is brown. Why won't you just sell be the damn TV?" The salesman replies "Because it's a microwave".

A blonde had just bought two horses but she couldn’t tell them apart. She went and asked a neighbour for some help "I can't tell these horses apart" she said.The neighbour told her to cut the tail of one of them off. So the blonde cut off the tail, and that worked great until the other one got it's tail cut off too. So, the blonde goes and tells the neighbour "I can’t tell them apart again!”.Well says the neighbour “Try cutting off the tip of one of the horses ears.” So the blonde cuts off the tip of the ear. That also worked great until the other one got a part of it's ear cut off. The Blonde goes back to the neighbour and tells him what happened. The neighbour says well measure them that will work for sure. It worked a treat since the white one was 6 inches taller than the black one!

A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet. "I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least five pounds. "When the blonde returns, she's lost nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that's amazing!" the doctor says. "Did you follow my instructions?"The blonde nods. "I'll tell you, though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day. ""From hunger, you mean?""No, from skipping. "

A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had 250,000 miles on it. One day, she spoke about her problem with a brunette she worked with at a salon. The brunette told her, "There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal." "That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "as long as I can sell the car." "Okay," said the brunette. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will turn the counter in your car back to 50,000 miles. Then it shouldn't be problem to sell it anymore." The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, "Did you sell your car?" "No," replied the blonde, "why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it."

A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, Iknow all of them." A friend says, "OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?" The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy: W."

A blonde was driving along a country lane one day, when she noticed in a field, another blonde sitting in a boat paddling away but getting no-where fast. Look at that fool she thinks to herself stops the car and exits it.Very annoyed she walks over to the fence and shouts to her "its dump blondes like you who give other blondes a bad name and if I could swim I'd come over there and kick your ass".

A blonde wearing a brown wig walks in a store and says to an employee "I'd like to buy that TV". The employee replies "Sorry, I don't sell TV's to blondes", and the blonde leaves the store. The next day, the same blonde walks in wearing a red wig. She says "I wish to buy that TV", to which the employee replies again "Sorry, I don't sell TV's to blondes". The blonde leaves the store. . . The next day, the same blonde walks in the store, with her hair dyed in black. She says "I would like to buy that TV". The employee replies again "Sorry, I don't sell TV's to blondes". The blonde is totally confused and asks the man, "I'm sorry, but I've worn a red and brown wig, and now I dyed my hair black, how did you know I am a blonde?". "Well", says the man, "that's not a TV, it's a microwave. "